Brian and the Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Week

Ever read the book, "Alexander and the Terrible, No Good , Very Bad Day." It's all about this little boy lamenting all of the terrible things that happened to him.

I feel like Brian has had that week. Well, technically I have had that week because of Brian's actions.

Wednesday we went to the preschool for our 2nd day back. Brian kept taking off his pants. As is every time I turned around his pants were off. He is very strong and it's very hard for me to fight him back into his pants. I am pretty sure I had to do this 4 times.

We went to leave and he took off toward the dumpster (we park in the back). There is much mud by the dumpster and it's one of his favorite places. Sadly it has rained a lot, so there were also lots of mud puddles.

Guess where he headed? Yep, right into it.

So I stripped him from the waist down and put him in the car.

Surprisingly, he did not take a nap. (I say that with much sarcasm.)

As soon as he got into our house, he took his diaper off. It took me an hour to get it back on. He's really strong. I put him time out on the toilet. Nothing worked. I finally had to sit on his leg and wrestle it on.

Yesterday, we had a better day. It was nice out. We walked to the park.

He was eating dinner and seemed fine, and all of a sudden he puked all over the living room floor. Now I know he cannot help that, but WHAT DOES HE HAVE AGAINST CLEAN FLOORS? Seriously! (Remember what he did to the kitchen floor last week??!)

Today I kept him home. He was running a fever and even though there was only one puke incident, I thought it would be best to be on the safe side.

He refused to put on his pants this morning, so I changed his diaper and put his pajama pants back on. I was fixing my hair and noticed him running through the hall naked from the waist down. (See a pattern here?) So I grabbed him and wrestled him back into a diaper. I smelled poo, but didn't see any, so I figured he just had gas. Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Let me back up here and make mention of the fact that Brian had chocolate fish (after powdered sugared donuts) for breakfast. I realize that this was not the best choice for breakfast period, let alone for a toddler who puked the night before, but he's two and that's what he wanted and he insisted.

Anyway, I was sitting on the couch after the diaper incident and noticed that some of the chocolate fish had fallen into the crack between two of the couch cushions.

WRONG!

Oh my gross. Poo. That's where it went. I should trust my nose.

But seriously, it's like living with a WILD ANIMAL.

What's to come tomorrow? I can honestly say I don't even want to know.

"Booty Camp" is on the calendar for next weekend. I am hoping Shawn is on board. If we aren't going to keep our clothes on, we are going to attempt to learn to go to the bathroom in the proper place.

***UPDATED**** FYI while I was writing this post, Brian got into the one remaining plant in our home, which by the way he has NEVER EVEN TOUCHED, and made a HUGE mess. He is now in time out bawling his eyes out. He can sit. I need to cool off. Anyone want a two year old?